me and bens.

Probably one of the most used phrases over the past 3 years:

me and bens.


Bryce hears it everyday when he asks how our day went.

A response usually sounds something like this:

Me and bens went to the park.
Me and bens played with friends.
Me and bens stayed in pj's all day.
Me and bens watched CARS 2, twice.
Me and bens went to chick fil a.
Me and bens are sick.
Me and bens went to Target.
Me and bens slept in until 930am.


Ive had many sleepless nights this pregnancy. You know those nights where you lay awake thinking crazy thoughts. One of these most recent nights, i couldnt stop thinking about this phrase "me and bens." It made me sad. Brought me to tears..and then sobs. For the past three years its been just me and him. i have loved it. Every.single.minute.of.it. I realized that baby brother would soon be with us and it would no longer be just me and bens.

The next morning I decided that we would have a mom&me day. A special day for just the two of us. A day set aside to spoiling this kid rotten before baby brother comes. When I could hear that he was awake I went into his room to explain the day to him. I told him that I wanted to have a special day with him before baby brother came. Just me and him. I could tell he understood me. I then asked if he wanted to go to Chuck e Cheese, and thats when the excitement started. He talked about it while we had breakfast and then while we got dressed.

I printed off an award to bring with us. A best helper award that scored us 10 free tokens.

We arrived a few minutes after it opened and had the whole place to ourselves for about 20 minutes. We ran around non stop for those twenty minutes checking out all of the games. Benson had to check out each and every one and then make the decision if he wanted to put a token in. 

He eventually found the section with the little kid rides and thats where we spent the remainder of our time and tokens. I had to put my competitive ticket winning thoughts aside and let Bens enjoy these little rides. 

Our pizza soon arrived at our table. Mom got busy eating while Bens alternated between rides and pizza bites.

About 3 hours later..we left Chuck-e-Cheese with full bellies, happy hearts, and a few souvenirs valued at $25.

Benson was so proud of his winnings. The bracelet was large and went all the way up to his bicep but it was his favorite color and he wore it with pride.

"thank you for my orange bracelet mom"

Oh, I love this boy.

And thats why I had to take him to Toys r us afterwards. There was no way that that little orange bracelet was going to be the souvenir from this mom&me special day.

I told Benson that he could pick out one surprise.

We walked down every single isle at Toys r us. And looked at practically every toy in the store. This boy did not grab toys from the shelves, did not cry, did not beg, nothing. He knew exactly what kind of toy he wanted. We eventually reached the isle with the CARS toys. This kid got giddy. We spent about 30 minutes in that cars isle studying each toy. He eventually found a set of 10 CARS, none of which he had. And his decision was made and I bought him his souvenir from our special day.

"thank you for my cars mom."

How could I not spoil this boy? He is such a good boy..everyday. But especially this day, he was extra good. He could sense it was a special day for me and him. And it was. And though someday he might forget about it, I will not. 

There will always be a special place in my heart for this first little boy of mine, and the 3 years we had all to ourselves. 

If there is one thing I have learned, it's, I now know why my older brother is my moms favorite.

its a boy.

its a boy.

its a boy.


I have to keep repeating it to myself. Or else I dont believe it.

I was 90% sure we were having a girl. When the ultrasound tech finally announced that it was a boy, i was in complete shock. I think my first words were "no way." followed by tears. Not tears of disappointment or sadness. But tears of happiness. I could so perfectly imagine my two boys together. I could see them there, right in front of me. Brothers. My feelings and emotions were beyond happiness.

Benson on the other hand.

His first words, when the tech announced it was a boy, were "no, its a baby sister."

It broke my heart. This little kid was so sure he was getting a baby sister. And it was all of this "baby sister" talk that made me and the majority of our family believe that it was a girl. He talked about her everyday like she was already with us. And before bedtime, I would get a big hug around the neck and an "i love you" followed by a hug around my stomach with a "love you too baby sister."

It took him a few days to wrap this big change around his finger. The first few days after finding out, we would catch him saying "love you too baby sister...(short thinking pause)... baby brother."

I can only imagine Bensons little brother, up in heaven, getting a good laugh at all of us.

But Benson is getting more and more excited each day as we talk about all of the things that we can do with a little brother. Things like, going for walks, and playing with cars, and riding our bikes, and playing at the park, and going to the beach, and eating cookies.

As for me, I am so thrilled to be getting another

one

of these.

and that makes me one happy mom.

Coming August 2012...

Im not sure what im more excited for, a new child in our home or to watch Benson become a big brother. 

I can already tell he's going to make the best big brother. He talks about his "baby sister" non-stop. "that's my baby sister" every time he points to the ultrasound on the fridge. And no, we dont know the sex of the baby yet, but little Bens is sure its a baby sister! He wont even fathom the thought of it being a brother. This kid is either going to be super happy or extremely disappointed with the outcome of this child. As for me, I can honestly say that I would be happy with either. I am just happy to be pregnant, happy to see our little family grow, and so happy to be giving birth AGAIN in the horribly hot month of August.

Here is the video we made to announce our pregnancy to our families.

2011

It was a great year. it really was. Probably the best year so far of my life. I have had many opportunities over Christmas and the New Year to think about the things I am grateful for. And these two boys are always at the top of my list. Its ridiculous how much i love them. I love being married to my best friend and I love this adorable little boy that we have. I love LOVE being a mom. More than anything on this earth..i love being a mom. I love wiping away tears and kissing booboo's. i love reading stories and going to the park. i love tickle fights and dancing goofy. I love giving hugs and rubbing noses. And I love saying "I love you" and hearing in return "luv you too momma." Its the greatest gift in the world and i feel blessed to be able to be a mother.

A few pictures of us and a whole lot of Benson.

hot cocoa.

Our hot chocolate machine has been brewing alot of hot cocoa this year. creamy, frothy, sweet sweet hot cocoa. Benson loves it, pretty much because we give it to him barely warm, so its more like chocolate milk but with marshmallows. 

Our cocoa-latte machine, this thing's amazing. I will never make a cup of hot cocoa without it.

I'm not sure whats going on in this picture? Not sure why Benson's face looks ginormous?
And not sure why he is trying to hold his mug with one finger. But me and bryce couldnt stop laughing when we came across this pic.

whitetrash?

wait for it...

there it is.

Not sure yet. wether i am completely disgusted. or completely proud of this.

christmastime

I'm obsessed with Christmas. I love everything about it. Except that its my busiest most craziest time of the year.

And for some reason or another, i am surviving. I give alot of that credit to bryce, who has been my mr brawny lately. Cleaning and picking up all of Benson's messes that take place everyday while im working on the computer. And i feel like there has been other help too. imaginary help that has given me the energy to work late at night allowing me to spend more time with my little family. And allowing me to enjoy every  little christmasy moment that takes place during this magical holiday.

One of my favorite moments is putting up the christmas tree. And it became one of Benson's favorites as well.

We turned on Christmas music, danced, sang, put up the tree and lights. And then we sat back and watched as Bens put all of the balls on the tree. He was loving it and he was in the zone. Every ball was placed with careful consideration. And after it was placed there was either a "yes!" or a "nice!" or a "i did it!"

There ended up being clusters of balls all along the bottom third of the tree. It looked hideous. But i loved it. And i loved that my little guy did it all.

We eventually spread the rest of the balls out. but now i am wishing we would have kept it the way it was.